Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Musings on children


This is one of my favorite pictures of Dr. Destructo. I found this little hat at the dollar store and took it to my neighbor/awesome photographer so we could play. My own little "Santa Baby".

There is a blog that I read that makes me cry every time I read it. It is the blog of a family who lost a 2 year old daughter from choking on a piece of apple. Their writing is beautiful. I'm tearing just thinking about it. Anyway, I have been thinking about something they posted a couple weeks ago. It is a quote from the book Peter Pan and I feel like this statement is as true and beautiful as any sentiment I've ever read. Here's the quote from their blog which contains the quote from the book:

"My favorite line of the book came just a couple pages from the very the end. Wendy, after their adventures in Neverland, returned with Peter Pan a few times to help with spring-cleaning. But soon Peter Pan lost track of time and didn't return for years...

“Years rolled on again, and Wendy had a daughter. This ought not to be written in ink but with a golden splash”.

Of all Wendy's adventures being a parent was the most glorious. In your journal does it not seem fitting to write about the birth of your children in gold rather than ink?"

K, now I'm full on crying with the simplicity and beauty of this truth. My heart just aches when I think of people who have lost a child. I think of how blessed we are to be having another one. I know I have said this before (and may again sometime, you never know) but being a mom is pretty much all I have ever wanted. When I look at my children the emotions just can't be explained or expressed just right. Now, I know I'm not alone in thinking these things about our children. I love that about being around other people who also adore their kids. I love being around people that obviously love each other, be it husbands and wives that love each other and aren't afraid to show it, or families that just can't hide the fact that they think their kids are the best and show it. Of course, nobody is perfect and we aren't all lovey and happy all the time, but that's also part of life and it's ok.

I remember when my Teeny-Bopper was just born, and we had tickets to a Phoenix Coyote hockey game. (have I told this story before? Sorry if I have!) We arranged a double date with a good friend and had a picnic dinner outside near the runway of Sky Harbor (you can't go their anymore now with all the security and what-not) and then went to the game. My mom came over to babysit our new little baby. I had pumped a bottle for her and everything, so should have had nothing to worry about, right? Everyone kept saying things like "Oh, how nice for you to get a break and have a night off." Stuff like that. Well....we got a little bit into the game and I realized I didn't want a "break" from my baby! I wanted to be with her! I missed her so badly we told our friends we had to go and rushed home to our little one. At that point I realized that I never wanted another "break" from my baby again. And to this day, I hate leaving my new babies for anything. I have come to accept the fact that I need those new babies as much as they need me. I need to hold them, smell them, snuggle, cuddle, and in all other ways be with them as much as possible. It's true, a break is needed. But it's a break from all the world except that baby. A break from life and all other worries and concerns besides that one little creature that has your attention like no other. I must add a little side-note for colic, though. We have been through this as well, and I admit that it IS nice to have someone else you trust come try to soothe that baby after days of screaming. I still like to be in the same room but having an upset baby is very draining. I remember with my Little Miss (our fussiest baby) my lovely sister-in-law C came and she could hold her and keep her happy for some of the time. It was so nice to have her because I felt like she almost loved that baby as much as I did and it truly was a break to have Little Miss stop screaming for a while.

It's a strange thought that we are going to have those little baby sounds here in a few months. We have begun piling up baby stuff around here and it's kind of weird to see all these things again...

8 comments:

Carla said...

The bond, between a mother and her child, be it healthy or unhealthy, is unbreakable.

Aren't we blessed to know why it is so strong, and be able to have time to enjoy it?

Enjoy!

*Katie May* said...

What a sweet post. I love being a mom too :)

Melinda said...

Very nice post Sally. I think it is ao exciting for your family to be expecting this little one soon.

I agree with your feelings on being a mom. It is the Best!!!

tdljld said...

That was beautiful, thanks for sharing

marie said...

What a nice post. It is a good reminder of how special our children are. You are such a great mom, I remember when you watched melanie for me, she never wanted to leave your house!!

House Of P said...

I remember those santa baby pics. He's so sweet! I can't wait to meet Dr. Destructo's sidekick!

C said...

You made me cry. Then I went and read two years worth of that blog you mentioned and cried my eyes out the rest of the night.

Love you!!

amy said...

you said it very well. I was a bit relieved tho' when you put that bit in about the colicky baby, coz i've had a little guilt this go round when i DID need/want a break from the baby. Fortunately, i'm feeling more bonded to him now and he is turning into such a cuddly baby. i love his little hugs! best thing in the world! xxx